{"id":1580,"date":"2013-12-24T12:04:30","date_gmt":"2013-12-24T17:04:30","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/netcommissioner.com\/askandy\/?p=1580"},"modified":"2013-12-24T12:04:30","modified_gmt":"2013-12-24T17:04:30","slug":"issue-376-december-25-2013","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/netcommissioner.com\/askandy\/2013\/12\/issue-376-december-25-2013\/","title":{"rendered":"Issue 376 \u2013 December 25, 2013"},"content":{"rendered":"

________________________________________
\nTwo years ago, instead of my usual column, my Christmas gift to you was a short story titled \u201cA Winter Tale.\u201d It was based on a story I\u2019d read as a boy, in a 1921 Boy Scout Yearbook passed down to me by my father, who had also been a Scout.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Many readers quickly wrote to me about how much they\u2019d enjoyed it. Several months passed, till my wife Linda suggested that maybe it might make a good beginning to a longer story. Still, I put that idea aside for several more months (after all, your letters kept coming in and needed answers). Linda mentioned the idea several more times over the ensuing months until one day in the spring of 2012, when I thought, \u201cHmm\u2026 Maybe she\u2019s right\u2014she usually is.\u201d So I started writing, and writing\u2026 It took more than a year. What emerged is a complete 100,000-word manuscript of a tale titled \u201cThe Mantooth Bone\u201d (I\u2019m in the \u201cagent\/publisher-seeking\u201d mode at the moment).<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cThe Mantooth Bone\u201d continues the tale of Eddie Stevens\u2014hardly the kind of kid who\u2019d turn out to be a mystery-solver, local hero, super-Scout, and boyfriend of the feistiest red-head in middle school. Heck, he\u2019s a short, bashful, absent-minded computer nerd who suffers from \u201cmorning hair\u201d 24-7. Besides, Eddie\u2019s convinced himself he\u2019s an \u201coops\u201d kid, and this makes him even more withdrawn.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Going well beyond Scouting, the tale becomes larger. Ultimately it\u2019s a story of how Eddie breaks through his secret sadness just as his father suffers a devastating injury from which he must fight his way back. There\u2019s also is the underlying mysterious death of his Scoutmaster\u2019s wife that Eddie uncovers, climaxing in a near-death struggle, but raising the question: What are the consequences of saving the life of someone who\u2019s just tried to kill you?<\/strong><\/p>\n

Chapter 2 (below) picks up immediately after Eddie decides the troop he wants to join. If you remember the original story, just start reading. If not, or you\u2019d like a \u201crefresher,\u201d go here first \u2013 http:\/\/netcommissioner.com\/askandy\/2011\/12\/a-winter-tale\/ \u2013 then come back and read on.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Here\u2019s Chapter 2 of THE MANTOOTH BONE\u2026<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u2026At the front door I kick off my snow boots and swing it open. Snuffy\u2019s already at the front door, wagging his tail and trying to jump up on me. I can see my parents turning toward me from in the kitchen. \u201cHi Mom! Hi Dad! Guess what troop I picked! I picked\u2026\u201d and that\u2019s as far as I get.<\/p>\n

\u201cGlad you\u2019re home, Eddie,\u201d my dad says from the kitchen. \u201cC\u2019mon in here for a minute. While you were out on your hike, your mother and talked it over. We think, if you really want to be a Scout, how about you join the troop where we go to church? I know it\u2019s a little farther away than where those other troops meet, but one of us can drive you there, so that should work out okay.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut that\u2019s not\u2026\u201d and I\u2019m stopped again. Dad points to where I should sit, Mom sits down across the table from me, next to Dad. We sort of look at each other with our mouths shut for a minute, just staring across the pine tabletop covered with the white supper dishes and the blue coffee mugs that match the color of the kitchen\u2019s walls. Today\u2019s newspaper is there, too, in assorted piles, with the crossword on top, finished with a pen, with no cross-outs, like my dad always does.<\/p>\n

\u201cI think you\u2019ll find that Scout troops are the same pretty much everywhere, Eddie,\u201d Dad starts in. \u201cIt doesn\u2019t really matter what troop you join, because they all do the same sorts of things: hiking, camping, and the like. I know Max was in Troop 5, but why not join the one at our church? After all, you already know the Sunday school teachers there, and probably some of the boys from Sunday school getting ready to start thinking about confirmation, which you\u2019ll do in just a couple of years. I see that look on your face, but why not give it a try? I\u2019ll bet it\u2019ll be just fine, okay?\u201d<\/p>\n

Like I really have a choice here. I feel this blackness right behind my eyes; it\u2019s not going away. I\u2019m feeling sorta\u2014what? Limp, I guess, is the right word. I\u2019d like to say \u201cthis really sucks\u201d but I already know that\u2019s not gonna work, and Mom hates that word anyway.<\/p>\n

\u201cOK, Dad, I\u2019ll try it, if you say so,\u201d and I slowly get up and go to my own room. I guess I could have argued back, but when Dad makes up his mind about something, that\u2019s usually the way it is; end of story. Not that he doesn\u2019t care or anything; he\u2019s just used to making decisions. That’s what he does on his job all the time, so it’s a pretty solid habit with him.<\/p>\n

\u201cEddie, don\u2019t you want some supper,\u201d my mom calls after me. \u201cI can warm up the casserole for you,\u201d as she gets up from the table and starts putting their dishes, forks, and coffee mugs in the sink. That\u2019s always puzzled me. Why do we wash dishes before we put them in the dishwasher? Isn\u2019t that the dishwasher\u2019s job?<\/p>\n

\u201cNah, it\u2019s okay, Mom,\u201d I call back over my shoulder. \u201cThe guys had lots of food for all of us this afternoon. Besides, I\u2019ve got homework for Monday and isn\u2019t an \u2018NCIS\u2019 rerun on tonight? I\u2019d like to watch it before going to bed.\u201d I know she\u2019s way older than me, but I still think Ziva\u2019s really hot, and I like the reruns she\u2019s in. Gibbs is a cool dude\u2014sorta looks like my dad, except my dad\u2019s way taller. I\u2019m only about five feet tall and Dad\u2019s well over six. I sure hope I get that early growth spurt, like Max did. He\u2019s six-foot-four, like Dad. Even Mom\u2019s nearly six feet tall! Then there’s me. Brown hair, brown eyes, skin that tans, like, in two seconds, but Dad and Max are both blond, blue-eyed, and burn to crisps in the sun! When people see all four of us together for the first time, they always think Mom and Dad each had a son first and then got married. Mom and Dad and Max always think this is just a riot! I don’t.<\/p>\n

\u201cOK, Eddie, we\u2019ll watch it together,\u201d my dad calls after me. \u201cIf you need any help with that assignment, I\u2019ll be in the family room.\u201d But first he gathers up the newspaper and puts it on a chair, then takes the rinsed dishes and stuff from Mom\u2019s wet hands and starts putting them in the dishwasher racks.<\/p>\n

Later, while we\u2019re watching the show, Dad does another crossword, Mom knits, and Snuffy curls up next to me on the couch. It\u2019s still chilly, so we throw some logs in the family room\u2019s fireplace. I love that fireplace. Mom wants Dad to convert it to gas, so we don\u2019t clutter up the family room with pine to start it and then oak logs later, but I really like that we use real wood. Sometimes on cold winter nights we even roast marshmallows over the flames, and that\u2019s the best ever.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

It\u2019s Tuesday night. Dad and Mom get home from work later than they usually do. I\u2019m getting my new Scout uniform on\u2014I figure I\u2019d better eat supper wearing it or I\u2019ll be late to my first troop meeting over at the church. My mom sewed the patches on in the right places this time, not like my old Cub uniform, when I was just seven, that she had to re-sew because she didn\u2019t check my handbook for where stuff was supposed to go. I felt really lame the first time I walked into a pack meeting and saw all the other kids wearing their patches and badges in places different from me. I figured they didn\u2019t know what they were doing till I got it that it was me that had it all wrong. Anyway, I know these are right. I checked \u2018em myself in my brother Max\u2019s old Scout Handbook.<\/p>\n

My dad drives tonight, because he wants to meet some of the leaders. He says a couple of them are Sunday school teachers, too. I think maybe I should tell him some of those teachers are real Napoleons, and we all hate Sunday school, but I\u2019m figuring this isn\u2019t the best time for that.<\/p>\n

We walk into a big and noisy basement room, full of Scouts. At the front, the two flags\u2014the American flag and the troop\u2019s\u2014are standing where you\u2019d expect them to be, but there\u2019s something different. In my old Cub Scout pack, the pack flag had a lot of streamers and ribbons tied to the top of it, from awards the pack had won. This troop flag is, well, just the flag on a pole in a stand; no ribbons. What\u2019s up with that? Well, maybe they have a scrapbook or something instead. But I\u2019m still wondering about some other stuff, like when I Googled \u201cTroop 22\u201d in our town and found\u2014nothing. No troop website, or Google citations, either.<\/p>\n

In the middle of the room there\u2019s this big guy, with a belly about the size of a Mack Truck\u2014you can\u2019t even see his belt or buckle. He spots us and marches over in big black boots with his blue jeans tucked into their tops and a way too small uniform shirt that looks like its buttons are gonna pop and then rocket across the room any second now. Then I get these big teeth in my face\u2014big as the tiles on our bathroom floor\u2014in this weird grin like he\u2019s trying to look all happy but hurts somewhere at the same time. \u201cGlad to meetcha, lad!\u201d he barks at me. His breath is weird. It smells like\u2014what? Gummi Bears?<\/p>\n

\u201cUh, I\u2019m Eddie Stevens, sir,\u201d is about all that comes out. My left hand goes out, for a Boy Scout handshake; he sticks out his right. It\u2019s the size of a catcher\u2019s mitt.<\/p>\n

\u201cNot so fast there, Freddy! In this troop, we use our right hand; none of that sissy left-hand stuff here!\u201d Then he grabs my own right hand and starts yanking it up and down like he\u2019s pumping water. \u201cI\u2019m Mister Sprockette, and I\u2019m your Scoutmaster!\u201d he bellows through his toothy grin. \u201cWelcome to my troop!\u201d at a decibel-count that could bounce off the back wall of the room. His pink bulby nose is so close to my face I can count the wet black hairs in his nostrils.<\/p>\n

\u201cHey, don\u2019t you have a brother, Mark or Mike or something?\u201d he asks. \u201cThat kid, I remember! Strapping lad, he was! Hard to believe you\u2019re his brother! He was in one of those other troops! Well, at least you\u2019re joining my troop! Even if you are a shrimp!\u201d Yeah I get that a lot. Oh, well, here we go again\u2026<\/p>\n

\u201cMister Sprock, I\u2019m Jim Stevens, Eddie\u2019s father,\u201d my dad speaks up for the first time. \u201cWhat time should I be back to pick him up?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s Sprockette! And you can pick him up at nine, sharp! But not so fast there! We\u2019re looking for a good Assistant Scoutmaster! How about it, Timmy?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, I\u2019ll think about it,\u201d says Dad with a cautious look. \u201cSee you at nine, Eddie.\u201d He pats me on the shoulder and he\u2019s out the door.<\/p>\n

Mr. Sprockette turns around to where the Scouts are playing a loose game that looks like a combination of basketball and dodge-ball. \u201cLine up!\u201d he hollers. \u201cWe gotta get started here! Lots to learn tonight!\u201d
\nHe tells me to stand over at the end of the line of Scouts\u2014there are maybe two dozen of \u2018em\u2014and then he leads us all in the Pledge of Allegiance and the Scout Oath and Law. I already read the first couple chapters of Max\u2019s Scout Handbook. Isn\u2019t a Scout supposed to be doing this stuff? That\u2019s what Sean did when I visited Troop 5, where he\u2019s the Senior Patrol Leader. Well, whatever. It\u2019ll be okay, I guess.
\nIt isn\u2019t.<\/p>\n

\u201cAlright! All of you on the floor, in a circle around me!\u201d Mr. Sprockette shouts at us. Then he spends the next hour standing over us, teaching us how to tie knots. Well, not teaching, really. More like doing the knots so fast you can\u2019t figure out what his catcher\u2019s mitt hands are doing, and then he shouts at us\u2014spit flies out of his mouth like wet fireworks each time\u2014when we can\u2019t do what he just did. As if we can even see over the top of his Mack Truck belly. Boy, I think, this is really weird.<\/p>\n

\u201cOK, we\u2019re done for the night!\u201d Mr. Sprockette announces. \u201cBetter know those knots next week, because I\u2019m gonna test ya!\u201d<\/p>\n

At least I get to know the Scouts to my right and left. Todd and Frankie. Todd\u2019s been in the troop about three weeks\u2014he was the \u201cnewbie\u201d till I showed up tonight. Frankie\u2019s been in for three years and he tells me he\u2019s just made First Class rank. Todd and Frankie shortened the Scoutmaster\u2019s name; they call him \u201cMister S.\u201d But it sure sounds like \u201cMister Ass.\u201d They may be right. We\u2019ll see\u2026<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cSo how\u2019d it go last night, Eddie?\u201d Lamar\u2019s asking me. Lamar Washington\u2019s family lives two houses away from ours. We\u2019ve been in the same classes at Winthrop School since kindergarten. I\u2019ve gotten to know his older brothers\u2014Louis, Leroy, and Leon\u2014pretty well, and even his two younger sisters\u2014LaRhonda and Latoya\u2014too. Louis and Leroy are in high school now, and star athletes. Leon\u2019s at Amherst-Ballard Middle School, where I\u2019ll be going next year, and he\u2019ll graduate into high school in a couple more months. Latoya\u2019s not in school yet; her mom and dad call her the \u201cfamily rug rat.\u201d LaRhonda, like most girls, is pretty much a pest. She\u2019s in third grade and never leaves me alone. Every time I go over to Lamar\u2019s house, she spots me coming up the driveway and always gets to the door first. \u201cEddie! You\u2019re here again! Eddie, come play with me! Come see my dolls! Come have pretend tea with me!\u201d Like I said, she\u2019s a pest.<\/p>\n

\u201cGotta tell you, Lamar, it pretty much sucked.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI thought you were gonna join Troop 1 or Troop 5. But you\u2019re in 22. What\u2019s with that?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, it was my parents\u2019 great idea; mostly my dad\u2019s. He wasn\u2019t a Scout, so I guess there\u2019s no way for him to know good from sucky.\u201d Then I tell Lamar about what went on in the troop meeting, and the more I think about it, the more I think maybe I don\u2019t want to do this at all.<\/p>\n

\u201cMaybe my dad was right. Maybe I should just play sports instead. I mean, just \u2018cause Max made Eagle doesn\u2019t mean I hafta!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNah, ya gotta give it more than one try, Eddie. Heck, I don\u2019t even get to try at all!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, I forgot,\u201d I admit. \u201cI\u2019m sorry your dad\u2019s so into Little League like he is. That doesn\u2019t give you much choice, I guess.\u201d<\/p>\n

Lamar\u2019s dad\u2019s been a Little League coach for, like, forever. He coached Louis, Leroy, and Leon when they played, and now it\u2019s Lamar\u2019s turn. Good thing Lamar really loves baseball, \u2018cause I really don\u2019t think he\u2019d have much of a choice. The best thing is Lamar\u2019s really skilled. He\u2019s been starting pitcher for his team ever since we outgrew T-Ball. Talk about an arm! Lamar\u2019s awesome. Sometimes though, his dad will start him as a centerfielder, \u2018cause he can throw screamers from the outfield straight to the catcher at home plate and never miss. Lamar will practice in his back yard for hours, pitching bucketsful of balls through an old tire that\u2019s been hanging from a tree branch out back for years\u2014probably since before Leon was even born. But no Scouts for Lamar; it\u2019s Little League or else, in his house. His dad said he could do Cub Scouts, and we were in the same den, and that was a lot of fun. But Boy Scouts and risk missing a Little League practice or game? Not a chance. Too bad. I think he\u2019d be a great Scout.<\/p>\n

\u201cSo, you wanna pitch, and I\u2019ll catch for you?\u201d I finally ask him.<\/p>\n

\u201cOK, Eddie, let\u2019s do it. I can work on the strike zone corners that way, and I don\u2019t have to lug the balls back-and-forth when you\u2019re here.\u201d So I borrow Leroy\u2019s old catcher\u2019s mitt and that\u2019s how we spend the afternoon, even though it\u2019s pretty chilly out in the back yard. But Lamar only practices for accuracy; no fastballs. We tried that once and his pitch turned into a fast curveball that I couldn\u2019t catch. It hit me were no guy ever ever wants to get hit. So, no fastballs or curves; just the strike zone corners. He\u2019s so good with his aim, and so consistent with his windup that we all gave him a nickname\u2014\u201cThe Washing Machine\u201d\u2014last season. It stuck.<\/p>\n

Lamar\u2019s a good guy and I\u2019m sorry he won\u2019t be in Boy Scouts with me\u2014if I stick it out, that is.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The next Tuesday rolls around way too fast. Dad\u2019s traveling again; London this time, I think. Tough to keep track; I think it\u2019s Gatwick Airport. He\u2019s a construction engineer; builds airport runways. Sometimes I get to go with him, if the airport\u2019s close by and he has to do a site inspection on a Saturday. I always like those trips. It\u2019s just Dad and me, and he shows me a lot of stuff that\u2019s cool to learn about, like about how runways are built, and how to use a slide-rule, which he still prefers over calculators. The one he uses was his dad\u2019s\u2014my grandfather\u2019s.<\/p>\n

Dad doesn\u2019t hug a lot, like Mom does, but he sure knows his stuff and how to teach it. \u201cMy son, the information sponge,\u201d he calls me sometimes. Yeah, I guess I am, and I\u2019m sorta lucky, too, ’cause whatever I read I can remember like it’s right there in front of me, even weeks and months after.<\/p>\n

Supper\u2019s fast tonight because it\u2019s just Mom and me, and Snuffy gets the scraps\u2014but not from the table. I actually like helping Mom with making supper and stuff. Hey, I\u2019ve made my own lunches for school since second grade. Works better for Mom and Dad, too, \u2018cause they\u2019re always real rushed in the morning, chugging cups of ugly black caffeine while I get Snuffy walked, then me off to the school bus, and both cars out of the driveway in opposite directions.<\/p>\n

Done with supper, now it\u2019s take out the garbage and the recycling, some more homework, and then into my uniform and off to the troop meeting in Dad\u2019s car but with Mom driving it. Beats Mom\u2019s minivan. Yeah, that minivan was important when Max was younger and I was just a baby an\u2019 all, but now? Dad\u2019s car is much cooler. It\u2019s an English car\u2014a Triumph. It\u2019s a 1973 TR-6 he rebuilt in our garage from the frame-up. Has its HISTORIC license plates, too! I was his helper when he rebuilt her. Well, more like parts-holder, for spark plugs, the carburetors, wiring harness and distributor, lug nuts, exhaust manifold, tailpipe, and stuff like that. But Dad talked about everything he was doing while I got to watch and listen. It\u2019s dark green\u2014British Racing Green, he says. With a 2.5 liter straight six engine, fifteen-inch wheels, and four-on-the-floor plus overdrive, it really hauls butt! I think Mom secretly likes driving it a lot more than the minivan she won\u2019t part with. She wants him to put a roll-bar in it, but Dad says that\u2019s not original to the car, so he won\u2019t do it. They don\u2019t argue or anything, but I know there\u2019s this little sort of air-gap between them on this, like some other stuff, too. They like each other a lot, though; they\u2019re just not all gushy about it. When we all watch TV together they always hold hands, and that\u2019s sorta nice, but they\u2019re not kissy-kissy all the time, which is good, \u2018cause that can get a little embarrassing, especially if we\u2019re out somewhere.<\/p>\n

Anyway, I\u2019d found the knots from last week in Max\u2019s old handbook, then found an awesome animated knot-tying website, so I worked on doing them a couple of times during the week when things were quiet, and I think I know them pretty good.<\/p>\n

I get to the troop meeting about ten minutes early, look for Todd and Frankie, and walk over. Good luck for me, maybe: Looks like they\u2019re in the same patrol.<\/p>\n

\u201cHey. Todd. Frankie. Okay to hang with you guys?\u201d I ask.<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, sure,\u201d they both say.<\/p>\n

\u201cHow\u2019re you doing with those knots?\u201d adds Todd. \u201cHere\u2019s some rope. Want to try \u2018em?\u201d<\/p>\n

We all practice the knots together, and we\u2019re all pretty good. Bowline, sheep-shank, sheet-bend, square, and a couple others. Then we join in on the basketball-dodge-ball game till we hear \u201cLINE UP!\u201d
\nThere\u2019s Mister S, bathroom tile teeth, Mack Truck belly, wet-haired nose, and those big, black, lace-up boots, standing in the middle of the room, his hand in the air with the three-fingered Scout sign, bellowing \u201cSIGN\u2019S UP!\u201d loud enough to crack concrete and drive a bus through the hole. Then it\u2019s the Pledge, Oath, and Law again, and I\u2019m still wondering: where\u2019s the Senior Patrol Leader, like in Troop 1 and Troop 5.<\/p>\n

Time for the knot-tying test. Mister S lines us up, gives us each a six-foot long piece of white nylon rope that\u2019s had its ends melted so it doesn\u2019t come apart. It looks to be quarter-inch, and it\u2019s braided; not three-strand laid. He tells us, \u201cOK, time for the TEST! Here\u2019s what you\u2019re gonna do: You\u2019re gonna tie the knot I tell you to, and drop it on the floor in front of you as soon as you\u2019re done! Then I\u2019m gonna check it! Anybody who takes longer than ten seconds, or who ties it wrong is OUT and gets to sit over there!\u201d He points to the floor near the side wall of the room. \u201cSpread out a little. Give yourself some working room. Ready\u2026 BOWLINE!\u201d<\/p>\n

I flip one end of my rope into the first loop, then weave the other end up, through, around, back down, tug, and drop the rope. Then fast, I look up and down the line. Other ropes are dropping, too. Others not; four Scouts are still struggling.<\/p>\n

\u201cTIME!\u201d Mister S shouts. \u201cYou, you, you, and you, you\u2019re too slow! Hand me your ropes and go sit over there! Now, let\u2019s see what we have here\u2026\u201d He picks up the tied rope of a Scout about four to my left. \u201cWRONG! Go sit with the others!\u201d He picks up another, farther down the line. \u201cWRONG! Don\u2019t you idiots know ANYTHING?! Go sit!\u201d Then three RIGHTs in a row, and he turns around and heads down toward the end of the line where I\u2019m standing. Another RIGHT, then another. Then a WRONG. Then me\u2026 \u201cRIGHT! Not bad for the newbie!\u201d and he moves to Todd, next to me. \u201cRIGHT!\u201d Then Frankie. \u201cWRONG! I ought a cut that First Class badge off a your shirt RIGHT NOW! Go sit!\u201d<\/p>\n

I watch Frankie. His shoulders slump, his face sags, his eyes get big and glassy-like. He\u2019s thirteen and he looks like a five year-old whose dog just died.<\/p>\n

\u201cOK, pick up your ropes and get ready\u2026 SHEEP SHANK!\u201d<\/p>\n

I throw the three loops, stretch them out, then a quick overhand loop around each end, and drop the rope. \u201cTIME!\u201d He picks up my rope first. \u201cRIGHT! Not bad, kid. Arnie, right?\u201d Then down the line. A couple WRONGS and three more RIGHTs. Now it\u2019s just Todd and me and two other Scouts; the rest are sitting dismally on the cold concrete basement floor.<\/p>\n

The next one\u2019s a no-brainer, the square knot. I\u2019m still in after Mister S calls time and walks down the line. Todd\u2019s out, and so is another; it\u2019s just me and one other Scout; he looks about the same age as Frankie, but man, is he ever big!<\/p>\n

\u201cReady\u2026 SHEET BEND!… TIME!\u201d Mister S checks both our knots lying on the floor, dropped at the same time. \u201cYou\u2019re both RIGHT! It\u2019s a TIE! OK, we\u2019re gonna do a tie-breaker! Pick up your ropes and untie \u2018em! Here we go\u2026 SAME KNOT\u2014BEHIND YOUR BACKS! GO!\u201d<\/p>\n

Instead of dropping one end to sling it around my back like the big guy next to me does, I keep both ends in my hands and flip the whole rope over my head, jump-rope style. Behind my back, I make the U, wiggle the free end up, around, and under itself, tug, drop the rope behind me. I look to my left. The big guy\u2019s still trying to tie the knot.<\/p>\n

Mister S barks, \u201cTIME!\u201d and then, \u201cHey, kid. How\u2019d you do that?\u201d he says to me. To the other, \u201cYOU LOSE! Go sit with the other LOSERS!\u201d He picks up my knot. \u201cYou got it right; you WIN!\u201d He stops; looks puzzled; shakes his head. I decide that this isn\u2019t a good time to show-boat\u2014or even smile.
\nThe Scouts sitting on the floor are mostly silent, except for Frankie and Todd, who are grinning and giving me thumbs-ups. OK, now I can smile back.<\/p>\n

\u201cHow\u2019d you let this new kid beat you all?\u201d Mister S turns to the Scouts hunched over, sitting on the floor. \u201cHe hasn\u2019t even earned his \u2018Scout\u2019 badge yet! That reminds me\u2026 Ernie, you come with me! You kids can play ball till I\u2019m done here!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cUh, it\u2019s Eddie, sir,\u201d I mumble. Does he ever get anybody\u2019s name right? We walk over to an old, beat-up wood desk in the back corner of the room. It has two even older-looking wood chairs\u2014one in front; the other by the knee-hole. They both look like somebody got \u2018em off the Titanic, they\u2019re that beat up and ready to fall apart. Mister S points to the chair in front and tells me to sit.<\/p>\n

\u201cGot your handbook?\u201d he asks. I show him Max\u2019s old one, that I brought with me tonight\u2014if I decide to stick it out, I\u2019ll buy my own sometime this week. \u201cGood! Your father gave me your application last week, so let\u2019s go over some stuff!\u201d He has me stand up and repeat the Pledge of Allegiance, then do the Scout sign, show how to salute, and do the Scout handshake, but with the right hand like he insists on instead of the left like the handbook says. \u201cLeft hand is for sissies!\u201d he tells me again. We do a couple other things, like describe the Scout badge, which I can do and I even know what the two stars next to the Eagle\u2019s wings mean, which seems to surprise him. \u201cOK, you\u2019re done. Next week I\u2019ll give you your Scout badge, so you\u2019d better be here and on-time or I\u2019ll flunk you and you\u2019ll do this all over again.\u201d
\nOh, whoopee! This is just so much fun\u2014NOT! I go home with Mom that night quiet, but grinning inside. I nailed that knot! And he didn\u2019t know what the stars on the Scout badge meant till I told him<\/p>\n

I usually catch the 7:05 school bus that stops two doors down from our house. But Thursday morning I miss it \u2018cause Snuffy refuses to poop till the last minute. I get him back in the house, grab my book bag and run down to the next block, where I know another bus stops a few minutes later, and jump on. There\u2019s Todd, sitting by himself in the third row.<\/p>\n

I sit down next to him. \u201cHey,\u201d I say.<\/p>\n

\u201cHey,\u201d back.<\/p>\n

\u201cSorry it wasn\u2019t you who won, at Scouts the other night,\u201d I tell him, and I mean it; he\u2019s a good kid and I like him.<\/p>\n

\u201cBummer,\u201d he says. \u201cBut how\u2019d you do that thing behind your back? Mister S does that to us all the time when he wants to make sure nobody wins. Nobody\u2019s ever done what you did. We thought it was great. You should a seen the steam coming out of his ears when he checked your knot. I thought his head was gonna explode!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cConfession time, I guess. My mom and dad say I\u2019m ambidextrous, and I guess I am, for some things. I play lacrosse and my coach always puts me in as forward cause I can switch hands on the stick and hurl goals from the left or right side, doesn\u2019t matter\u2014confuses the defense guys on the other team.\u201d<\/p>\n

Todd asks, \u201cCan you write with both hands, too?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNah, not so well. But in art class, I can do pencil drawings either way, which is good sometimes when I need to draw mirror images that I want to match. And it made the piano pretty easy to learn, when I was a little kid.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cJeez. That\u2019s neat, Eddie,\u201d Todd says. \u201cSo that\u2019s how you did that knot, huh?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, I guess so. I didn\u2019t exactly have a lot of time to think about it; I just did it. But how about we don\u2019t tell Mister S. Never know when I might need that again.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou mean Mister Ass<\/em>, don\u2019t you?\u201d Todd grins. I grin back.<\/p>\n

Maybe I\u2019ll switch to this bus. It\u2019s a little far, but I\u2019m a runner anyway, so no big deal. Mom and Dad won\u2019t mind\u2014heck, they probably won\u2019t even know\u2014because they\u2019re usually out the door and into their cars like two minutes before me, anyway. Besides, on my regular bus there are guys from Troop 1 and Troop 5, and there\u2019s this sort of awkward thing between us because I\u2019m in a totally different troop and not the one I wanted to join, and we all know it. Yeah, riding with Todd\u2019s gonna be OK\u2026<\/p>\n

Merry Christmas & Happy Scouting!<\/strong><\/p>\n

Andy<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

Have a question? Facing a dilemma? Wondering where to find a BSA policy or guideline? Write to askandybsa@yahoo.com. Please include your name and council. (If you\u2019d prefer to be anonymous, if published, let me know and that\u2019s what we\u2019ll do.)<\/strong><\/p>\n

[No. 376 \u2013 12\/25\/2013 \u2013 Copyright \u00a9 Andy McCommish 2013]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

________________________________________ Two years ago, instead of my usual column, my Christmas gift to you was a short story titled \u201cA Winter Tale.\u201d It was based on a story I\u2019d read as a boy, in a 1921 Boy Scout Yearbook passed down to me by my father, who had also been a Scout. Many readers quickly […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[21],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1580","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-21"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/netcommissioner.com\/askandy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1580","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/netcommissioner.com\/askandy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/netcommissioner.com\/askandy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/netcommissioner.com\/askandy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/netcommissioner.com\/askandy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1580"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/netcommissioner.com\/askandy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1580\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1584,"href":"http:\/\/netcommissioner.com\/askandy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1580\/revisions\/1584"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/netcommissioner.com\/askandy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1580"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/netcommissioner.com\/askandy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1580"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/netcommissioner.com\/askandy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1580"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}