________________________________________
\nIt\u2019s 9:15 Saturday morning. The Scout should be arriving momentarily; he\u2019s earned Communications merit badge, so I\u2019m hoping his counselor added to his knowledge\u2014but not the requirements\u2014by letting him know the best way to show respect when you make an appointment with anyone is to arrive ten minutes early\u2014especially since this also gives you nine minutes of \u201cwiggle room\u201d in case you get hung up along the way. The appointment the Scout set\u2014his schedule and his decision, by the way\u2014was for 9:30, so the clock\u2019s about to start ticking.<\/p>\n
My phone rings. It\u2019s the Scout. \u201cUh, Mister Andy,\u201d he begins, \u201cI\u2019m gonna be a little late. My mother has to drop my little brother off at the ice skating rink first, and then she\u2019ll bring me to your house. I should be there by 10:30.\u201d<\/p>\n
10:30, I\u2019m thinking. 10:30\u2019s an hour late. I\u2019d planned on spending an hour with him because, at 10:30, I need to leave for an appointment of my own. \u201c10:30?\u201d I reply. \u201cScout, that\u2019s not going to work. My day\u2019s already crowded. We\u2019ll have to cancel today, and reschedule for another day and time.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAw, but today\u2019s the only day I can meet with you!\u201d he tells me. \u201cMy parents really want me to complete this merit badge with you.\u201d<\/p>\n
Oh, really, I\u2019m wondering. If this is so important to his parents, why in the world would his mother interfere with her son\u2019s pre-set schedule? \u201cDid your mother know, yesterday, when you made this appointment, that we\u2019d agreed on 9:30?\u201d I ask him.<\/p>\n
\u201cOh, yeah, she knew,\u201d he tells me. \u201cBut my brother has to get to the rink on time, \u2019cause he\u2019s with a group and that\u2019s their start-time.\u201d<\/p>\n
Doesn\u2019t this Scout, and his mother, know that he has a start-time too? And that start-time is 9:30?<\/p>\n
\u201cDid your mother consider dropping you off first, early, and then getting your brother to his ice skating thing?\u201d I ask him.<\/p>\n
\u201cOh, yeah. But she got a late start and couldn\u2019t do that.\u201d Now I can hear the panic rising in his voice.<\/p>\n
\u201cOkay, Scout, tell you what\u2026 How about later this afternoon? Say around 2:30?\u201d I figure I can juggle my own schedule and create a window for him, if I make a couple of quick phone calls myself.<\/p>\n
\u201cHey, thanks, Mister Andy!\u201d The cheer returns to his voice. \u201cI can do that! I\u2019ll see you at 2:30, for sure!\u201d<\/p>\n
So that\u2019s what happened, and all went well.<\/p>\n
But did I make a mistake? Should I have spoken to his mother, telling her that her son made an appointment, cleared it with her beforehand, and it\u2019s her absolute responsibility to assure that he\u2019s not put in a situation such as she created? Or would that have simply made this Scout the victim and me the \u201cbad guy\u201d?<\/p>\n
I honestly don\u2019t know. But I do know this: When a parent patently disregards his or her son\u2019s commitment to a scheduled meeting, that parent is teaching more than a disregard of a schedule\u2026more than a disregard of a commitment. This is teaching disregard of other human beings.<\/p>\n
Is there a New Year\u2019s resolution here\u2026?<\/p>\n
Andy<\/p>\n
Have a question? Facing a dilemma? Wondering where to find a BSA policy or guideline? Write to askandybsa@yahoo.com. Please include your name and council. (If you\u2019d prefer to be anonymous, if published, let me know and that\u2019s what we\u2019ll do.)<\/p>\n
[No. 377 \u2013 12\/28\/2013 \u2013 Copyright \u00a9 Andy McCommish 2013]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
________________________________________ It\u2019s 9:15 Saturday morning. The Scout should be arriving momentarily; he\u2019s earned Communications merit badge, so I\u2019m hoping his counselor added to his knowledge\u2014but not the requirements\u2014by letting him know the best way to show respect when you make an appointment with anyone is to arrive ten minutes early\u2014especially since this also gives you […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[21],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1582","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-21"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/netcommissioner.com\/askandy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1582","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/netcommissioner.com\/askandy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/netcommissioner.com\/askandy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/netcommissioner.com\/askandy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/netcommissioner.com\/askandy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1582"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/netcommissioner.com\/askandy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1582\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1587,"href":"http:\/\/netcommissioner.com\/askandy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1582\/revisions\/1587"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/netcommissioner.com\/askandy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1582"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/netcommissioner.com\/askandy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1582"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/netcommissioner.com\/askandy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1582"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}